When Psychotherapy Meets My Daily Quiet Time

In my personal Bible Study, I am focusing on one particular passage this week:
 
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, 
and do not lean on your own understanding. 
In all your ways acknowledge him, 
and he will make straight your paths. 
(Proverbs 3:5-6, ESV)

There are three simple instructions here:

1. Trust the Lord with all your heart
2. Do not Lean on your own understanding
3. In all your ways acknowledge him.

And there is one promise:  He will make straight your paths, or as Eugene Peterson put it, “He will keep you on track”

One of the things I have been working hard to do since my hospital stay is reworking my negative thoughts.  This is not easy work.  It is scriptural, for sure (take every thought captive), but when you have enslaved yourself with your own negative self-talk for so long, getting all untwisted is exhausting at times.

As I reflected on this verse, it occurred to me that this provides an additional check against my thoughts.  [My psychologist in the hospital suggested that I take ever negative thought and ask:  Is it true?  Does it make me feel how I want to feel?  Does it help me reach my goals?].

Now here is a little peek into my therapy sessions.  One of the overriding negative thoughts that I tie myself down with is:

I am a failure.  I failed at church planting.  I failed at insurance.  I failed at time shares.  I fail, I fail, I fail.  I am a failure.

So I worked in my notebook at the hospital to take a serious look at this thought.  After I answered the questions, I came up with this thought to rehearse instead of thinking “I am a failure.”

Hawaii did not work out the way I wanted it to, and I am not a salesman, but there are plenty of things that I can do that I have yet to try.

That’s not bad, and it is a lot more hopeful, but after spending some time in Proverbs 3:5-6, I decided to do some additional work on this thought:

I added the question:  Am I leaning on my own understanding or am I trusting the Lord?  The notion that I am a failure is based solely on my own understanding of things that have happened and the silly idea that I can predict the future.  Next question?  What would it mean to acknowledge Him in this situation?

For the answer there, my mind went to Philippians 4:13: I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

So I edited my reworked thought at bit and now this is what I will tell myself whenever I start to think I’m a failure:

​Hawaii did not end the way I wanted it to but good things happened there.  I have learned that I am not a salesman but there is still plenty of things I have not tried, and as I seek the Lord, it will be His power and not my own on which I may rely!

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